Anti-Communist Interpretation of Cinderella

Here is what we think of Cinderella after watching it 3,000 times with Maggie:

At first, our take on Cinderella was that she just represented your typical barbie-doll bimbo: sweet, but not a whole lot going on upstairs. I mean, think about it. She certainly doesn't come from a long line of geniuses if her father was stupid enough to marry a woman like the wicked stepmother (because he thought Cinderella "needed a mother," we're told!) yet make no legal provision for Cinderella in the event of his death. And, c'mon, who would really be so dumb as to get tricked into being the slave of your stepmom and stepsisters in your own house? Do they also want us to really believe that Cinderella didn't even know that she was dancing with the prince when the two of them so obviously had the run of the palace that evening? For that matter, who would run away from the man of her dreams after the most romantic evening EVER without even leaving her name???

However, upon deeper reflection and 1,000 more viewings we have come to understand that Cinderella is not the bimbo that we thought, but rather a cunning and dedicated revolutionary intent on bringing down the entire kingdom! The kingdom far far away, you see, depends upon a strict social hierarchy with no intermarrying among the different classes to keep the peace. The scheming svengali Cinderella---a woman of common birth---along with the paleo-Marxist the fairy godmother ("FG" as she is called in anarchist circles) and her revolutionary cohort of mice and birds, plan to overthrow the old social order by seducing and marrying the handsome prince, the leader of the class of ruling elite. On this reading, Cinderella doesn't get "tricked" into becoming anyone's slave; rather, she must embrace the life of the proletariat in preparation for her mission of destruction.

And everything Cinderella does is coolly calculated to get the prince to fall so madly in love with her that he will forget his duty to marry from within the nobility. FG and Cinderella have plotted and planned the encounter at the ball in excruciating detail for months, setting up miniature mock ups and running through the plan over and over again ala "Ocean's 11." They know from paid palace informers that the prince's main weakness is that he is intrigued by mystery, and they manipulate that character flaw to their full advantage. The leaving of the glass slipper is the centerpiece of their plot.

Thus, the real heroine here is not Cinderella; it is the wicked stepmother, a "woman of noble birth" we are told. Only she realizes the true nature of the threat Cinderella presents to the peace and stability of the kingdom. She takes instant action, trying to get the prince to take interest in one of her daughters, who are of legitimate noble blood, instead of Cinderella. When it becomes clear to her that the handsome prince has been seduced by Cinderella, the wicked stepmother---as a last resort---imprisons Cinderella. Despite the heroism of the wicked stepmother, it is too late. Cinderella is freed by her hardy band of revolutionaries, marries the handsome prince, and destroys any hope for lasting peace in the kingdom.

Many of these themes are explored once again in detail in The Little Mermaid for those who are interested.